East Germany was so total in its totalitarianism that everything was banned which wasn't compulsory.

On Michael Moore TV show, when he went to the home of the guy who invented the car alarm and set off all the car alarms on the block... pretty funny.

I remember thinking cocaine was subtle until I noticed I'd been awake for three weeks and didn't know any of the naked people passed out around me.

If I do, I say so. That's the only way out of that. If there are three words that need to be used more in American journalism, commentary, politics, personal life... it's the magic words "I don't know." I mean, there are certain basic principles, like the dignity of the individual and the individual's responsibility, and certain basic economic principles, like how when something costs less, more of it will be consumed... There are certain things that I feel pretty confident about.

Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper.

War will exist as long as there's a food chain.

Never serve oysters in a month that has no paycheck in it.