Think about last time you were broke ... now how well did it go with spending your way out of it? Did that work?

A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat.

I write because I like to make things and the only things I am good at making things with are words.

Government proposes, bureaucracy disposes. And the bureaucracy must dispose of government proposals by dumping them on us.

The U.S. tax code was written by A students. Every April 15 we have to pay somebody who got an A in accounting to keep ourselves from being sent to jail.

Long conversations with pals when neither you nor they have had a drink can be a test of palship.

Fashionably amusing table manners are a matter of breaking the right rule at the right time.