Billy Carter, who asked his brother Jimmy, Do you think you could get me on the Gong Show? Never got a dinner!

J. Paul Getty, who still hasn't been buried - they keep finding oil! Never got a dinner!

Rip Van Winkle, who said, Don't make the bed; I'm just going to the bathroom. Never got a dinner!

Pope John Paul II's press secretary, who said, See, if only the Pope were Italian, he woulda shot back! Never got a dinner!

Julius Caesar's wife, who said to Julius, We are not naming our son Sid! Never got a dinner!

Orville Wright said to his brother, "Wilbur, you were only in the air for 12 seconds. How could my luggage be in Cleveland?"

The Puerto Rican doctor, who wrote all his prescriptions with spray paint. Never got a dinner!