Aladdin, who said to his wife, I know it's not a lamp, keep rubbing! Never got a dinner!

Alexander the Great, who said on his wedding night, It's only a nickname. Never got a dinner!

Rip Van Winkle, who said, Don't make the bed; I'm just going to the bathroom. Never got a dinner!

The Puerto Rican doctor, who wrote all his prescriptions with spray paint. Never got a dinner!

Elizabeth Taylor has a big heart. She recently built a halfway house for girls who don't want to go all the way.

Joan Rivers, who said to Marcel Marceau, Can we talk? Never got a dinner!

Burt Reynolds, great sex symbol of the movies, who said, I owe it all to one great part. Never got a dinner!