My philosophy? Have a laugh for as long as you can and don't get run over. Or stabbed.

We didn't evolve; God made us. So I just want to explain to you exactly how that happened... Some of the things you'll hear do sound a little bit far-fetched. I admit that. Then I found out that the other name for The Bible is The Gospel, so it is all true. Luckily, the clue is in the title.

You now have the least amount of time you've ever had, to do everything you've ever wanted to do. Enjoy your life. You only get one

I never had a plan. I just sort of ambled along, doing exactly what I wanted every day of my life.

It's going to be a night of partying and heavy drinking. Or as Charlie Sheen calls it: Breakfast.

Being on the edge isn't as safe, but the view is better

If you pay attention to good critics, you have to listen to the bad. So you have to ignore them all really. You can't just cherry pick the glowing ones.