I am realizing how old I am 'cause I am meeting so many people that were born in the 80s, which is crazy to me that I was going through puberty and [they weren't] even alive.

I'd played a lot of best friends, and/or bad guys, which seems to be my lot in life. In romantic comedies there's always a best friend and the woman has a best friend and they always antagonise each other and then they end up together at the end of the movie.

I remember interviewing someone I actually felt bad for, and therefore didn't want to take an ironic stance against him. It actually turned out to be a really funny piece.

I peed in my wife's boot once. On honeymoon, in Madrid, we were drinking absinthe and somehow made it back to our hotel. I don't remember a second of this, but my wife woke up to this noise. Two of her boots were in the corner, one had fallen down and the other was standing up and I was peeing into it! It was a hole, and it looked like a toilet. She said: "Rob, wake up, you're peeing into my shoe!"

As a teenager, I was very much a people pleaser and that excludes being adventuresome at all. I was a Boy Scout though and so that's as adventuresome as I got.

I always fancied myself more of an actor than a comedian before I realized that only assholes make that kind of distinction.

I learned more about elections on election night 2000 than I ever did during my 16 years of schooling.