I've been an Apple guy since the mid 80's and that's when I was like, "Boy, you guys really got me here. I know exactly what you're doing, right down to your price points."

I've always wanted to be an actor. I didn't get into this game to be the best improviser in the world. I didn't choose improv as a stepping stone, it just happened to become one.

The first year or so on The Daily Show is pretty intense in terms of travel. You're going to the worst places in the country, talking to the craziest people in the world.

I really think of it - acting and writing and producing, whatever - as shipping. You gotta ship. Put the widget together in the easiest, quickest way possible and ship the product.

I always fancied myself more of an actor than a comedian before I realized that only assholes make that kind of distinction.

I'm a complete egomaniac. It makes me feel terrible to say [being interviewed] is hard. It's taxing in a way. Just 'cause it's a lot of mental energy just to keep focused. I actually think it's harder for journalists.

Stand-up is a real art form in itself and one that I really think to be good at you have to devote your entire life to. It's the really, really good ones that end up getting to do the things that I like to do: movies, TV shows, and stuff like that. It's a really hard gig and it just never called to me.