People moved in across the street and are immediately cutting down a huge tree. Their toothbrushes will know my buttonhole.

My stand-up is far more rooted in reality than my Twitter.

I had always loved comedy, and acted out Steve Martin and Bill Cosby albums with my sister for my parents on road trips and stuff, and I loved to laugh and make people laugh.

In real life, I am alarmingly boring.

I no longer believe in freedom of speech.

Running is special. We've all done it: well, poorly, focused, in fear, being pursued, toward a goal. It's just elemental. Running is like fire.

Depression taught me the importance of compassion and hard work, and that you can overcome enormous obstacles.