Cats probably wouldn't need 9 lives if they wore tiny little helmets and didn't smoke cigarettes.

I think your ambition for something changes as you go.

I had always loved comedy, and acted out Steve Martin and Bill Cosby albums with my sister for my parents on road trips and stuff, and I loved to laugh and make people laugh.

It makes me sad that corporations and media and Hollywood conspire to make people feel terrible about their bodies from the second they wake up ,so I sort of try to subversively undercut that.

If you have an opinion on what other adults do consensually with other adults when they take their pants off, you're a weirdo.

Depression taught me the importance of compassion and hard work, and that you can overcome enormous obstacles.

I'm crazy about Shakespeare, who was a notorious word inventor. And my wife is an English teacher, and she's hilarious.