On Twitter, I just want to make you laugh at all costs.

Cats probably wouldn't need 9 lives if they wore tiny little helmets and didn't smoke cigarettes.

We can and should complain about certain horrors of the modern world, but when it comes to the treatment of mental illness, the advances made in the last hundred years have been far more significant than the space program, nuclear fission, or even The Wire, for so many fortunate people.

People who concern themselves with the rights of other adults who engage in consensual acts involving sex, love, and/or eating croissants together are damaged and in pain.

I had always loved comedy, and acted out Steve Martin and Bill Cosby albums with my sister for my parents on road trips and stuff, and I loved to laugh and make people laugh.

Elderly people, I have found, when they're being honest, are also scumbags, and enjoy a little prurient humour as well.

I want people to feel good about themselves.