The pencil sharpener is about as far as I have ever got in operating a complicated piece of machinery with any success.
Robert BenchleyThere is probably no more obnoxious class of citizen, taken end for end, than the returning vacationist.
Robert BenchleyThere is a note in the front of the volume saying that no public reading may be given without first getting the author's permission. It ought to be made much more difficult to do than that.
Robert BenchleyThe art of cursing people seems to have lost its tang since the old days when a good malediction took four deep breaths to deliverand sent the outfielders scurrying toward the fence to field.
Robert BenchleyWho has not wished that his host would come out frankly at the beginning of the visit and state, in no uncertain terms, the rulesand preferences of the household in such matters as the breakfast hour? And who has not sounded out his guest to find out what he likes in the regulation of his diet and modus vivendi (mode of living)?
Robert Benchley