The pencil sharpener is about as far as I have ever got in operating a complicated piece of machinery with any success.

The pencil sharpener is about as far as I have ever got in operating a complicated piece of machinery with any success.

Sheer madness is, of course, the highest possible brow in humor.

It was one of those plays in which all of the actors unfortunately enunciated very clearly.

The knocking out of a pipe can be made almost as important as the smoking of it, especially if there are nervous people in the room. A good, smart knock of a pipe against a tin wastebasket and you will have a neurasthenic out of his chair and into the window sash in no time.

Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did.

For a nation which has an almost evil reputation for bustle, bustle, bustle, and rush, rush, rush, we spend an enormous amount of time standing around in line in front of windows, just waiting.