Man is the only animal who enjoys the consolation of believing in a next life; all other animals enjoy the consolation of not worrying about it.
The object of most prayers is to wangle an advance on good intentions.
The difference between education and know-how is that one you pay for, the other you charge for.
Life is a vale of tears in which there are moments you just can't stop giggling.
Sometimes, to pursue a new idea, the artist must forfeit his deposit on an old idea.
Sometimes I wonder — if I were drop-dead handsome, and every woman I met actually dropped dead, would I ever get tired of it?