People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White House.

I'm sorry, if you were right, I'd agree with you.

Finding a good script is really difficult and the scariest thing of all is when they say about a script that's not right, "we will fix it.." It's like before you get on the Titanic and you see a big hole. In process, it's too late.

Cricket is basically baseball on valium.

If there was a pill that allowed you to drink and not get drunk, an alcoholic would go "What happens if you take two?"

What's my credibility? Why are they looking to me for advice? Isn't there someone more qualified?

Divorce is expensive. I used to joke they were going to call it 'all the money,' but they changed it to 'alimony.' It's ripping your heart out through your wallet.