Compassionate conservative. I don't know what that is, it sounds like a Volvo with a gun rack.

I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone.

Golf is one of the few sports where a white man can dress like a black pimp and not look bad.

If you want to die, don't make a mistake and not quite kill yourself because the medical bills in America are hideous.

How much more can you give? Other than, literally, open-heart surgery onstage? Not much. But the only cure you have right now is the honesty of going, this is who you are. I know who I am.

It doesn't matter who you are, if you've got the legs, you can hang with them.

Oh, no. To live... to live would be an awfully big adventure.