Golf is one of the few sports where a white man can dress like a black pimp and not look bad.

Boys, you must strive to find your own voice, because the longer you wait to begin the less likely you are to find it at all.

But if there's love, dear... those are the ties that bind, and you'll have a family in your heart, forever.

People would say I never censor. As Billy Crystal says, 'I don't have that button.'

Taking Viagra after open heart surgery is like a Civil War re-enactment with live ammo. Not good.

When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family knew someone in the Royal family?

The sort of liveliness which increases with age is not far distant from madness.