Even mistakes can be wonderful.
The meek may inherit the earth, but they don't get in to Harvard.
I had to stop drinking alcohol, because I used to wake up nude in front of my car with my keys in my ass.
People say that I'm a tree hugger, but I do a lot more than hug trees. I like having my drinking water without faecal matter, that's really nice. Or acceptable levels of strychnine. I'm an air breather, I've gotten used to that over the years.
No man is an island; but some are peninsulas.
I wonder what chairs think about all day: "Oh, here comes another asshole."