They're talking about partial nuclear disarmament, which is also like talking about partial circumcision - you either go all the way or forget it.

Honey, you [Michael Jackson] gotta pick a race first. All of a sudden you're a black man, then you're Diana Ross, now you're Audrey Hepburn. Then he's got the little beard going on. He's like Lord of the Rings, the entire cast. Michael's about to jump species.

I want to do a movie, but it has to be the right movie, whether it's independent or a studio movie. I'm much more open to being a supporting actor. At the age of 60, I'll be second fiddle. Fine. I'm happy to do it.

No man is an island; but some are peninsulas.

Stand-up is the place where you can do things that you could never do in public.

Kid, if You Need Booze or Drugs to Enjoy Your Life to the Fullest, You're Doing It Wrong.

It doesn't matter who you are, if you've got the legs, you can hang with them.