Ah...so many pedestrians, so little time...

I had sex with a prostitute when I was 21, I was so bad, she gave me a refund.

You could talk about same-sex marriage, but people who have been married (say) 'It's the same sex all the time.'

I love being backstage, or doing littler things like Blame Canada.

There's this thing called freebasing. It's not free, it costs you your home. It should be called 'homebasing'.

I did an event in Washington, and it was like we lifted a sea.Immediately after [9/11], there was a stunned shock - kind of this feeling of "What do we do now?" I started performing, and there was a catharsis in the laughing. People started to be able to laugh again. Laughter can be many things - sometimes a medicine, sometimes a weapon, depending on.

The great thing about marriage is the idea of really getting to know someone. And really getting to know a woman is a life long task.