Please, don't worry so much. Because in the end, none of us have very long on this Earth. Life is fleeting.

If you're that depressed, reach out to someone. And remember, suicide is a permanent solution, to a temporary problem.

I had my back waxed once by two women... and at one point they said, Do you mind if we take a break?

Women are wonderful. They're amazing creatures. You can never learn enough! They're addicting in the most amazing sense.

In England, if you commit a crime, the police don't have a gun and you don't have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say 'Stop, or I'll say stop again.'

Seize the day. Because, believe it or not, each and every one of us in this room is one day going to stop breathing, turn cold, and die.

You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.