My favorite thing to do is ride a bicycle. I ride road bikes. And for me, it's mobile meditation.

You know the difference between a tornado and divorce in the south? Nothing! Someone is losing a trailer.

Comedy is there to basically show us we fart, we laugh, to make us realize we still are part animal.

Things that I see in the future. I see... it could be quite incredible if we can master a few problems, like the air and the water thing might be nice. I see governments dissolving these barriers are all falling down for economic reasons. They're all so interbound.

When you create you get a little endorphin rush. Why do you think Einstein looked like that?

Even when I did my Broadway show, I did 15 minutes no one had seen before, because that was the night that Michael Jackson protested about Al Sharpton bailing on him. I said, "Wow, if that man bails on you, this must be really a lost cause."

Gentiles are people who eat mayonnaise for no reason.