Men may have wars, but women have their period. Men go off and kill each other, but women say nasty things, which is even better.

Carpe per diem - seize the check.

They say our mothers really know how to push our buttons - because they installed them

The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, 'Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and yelling, 'You want a piece of me?'

When the media ask George W. Bush a question, he answers, 'Can I use a lifeline?'

We have a president for whom English is a second language. He's like 'We have to get rid of dictators,' but he's pretty much one himself.

You have an internal critic, an internal drive that says, 'OK, you can do more.' Maybe that's what keeps you going.