We have a president for whom English is a second language. He's like 'We have to get rid of dictators,' but he's pretty much one himself.

You're going to the cemetery with your toothbrush. How Egyptian

You could talk about same-sex marriage, but people who have been married (say) 'It's the same sex all the time.'

You treat a disease, you win, you lose. You treat a person, I guarantee you, you'll win, no matter what the outcome.

Canada is like a loft apartment over a really great party.

Having George W. Bush giving a lecture on business ethics is like having a leper give you a facial, it just doesn't work!

It's hotter than a snake's ass in a wagon rut.