Nature Boy, whats that? Do you run around the forest like Euell Gibbons, eating bark or something?

My friends keep telling me I'm doing it with Mary Palmer. That's not true - I'm too busy masturbating to meet anyone new.

You'll find sympathy in the dictionary between sh*t and suicide.

Aww, whats the problem, gertrude? You mean to tell me that you can't walk into a bar with a $100 bill on your forehead and walk with anything, either male or female?

Ever notice Hulk Hogan ain't got no hair on his chest? The only one who's got hair on their chest on their team is Cindy Lauper.

Did your parents build knows you a swing facing a wall when you were a kid?

I'm the reason Hulk Hogan lost his hair.