They call me Tater Salad

You know, my first album, some of those jokes I'd done for twelve years because I couldn't throw 'em out.

I do live like a rock star, but it's not as great as it sounds. It's a lot of traveling.

I didn't get where I am today by worryin' about how I'd feel tomorrow.

I started selling out comedy clubs before I got to town with no advertising. I was selling out theaters just on the rumor that I was going to be there.

Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty... mine's putting in an express lane.

The next time you have a thought... let it go.