I really understood a lot more about comedy after listening to Bill Hicks, who died at 32 years old. He's probably the best comedian who ever lived. Although you can't say that because of Carlin, Cosby and Pryor.

I believe that a bad Super Bowl halftime show is still better than a soccer game.

Apparently I ain't the only cat on the block digs cheetos.

There have been times in my life that I've had a ton of vices, and my demons have run amok for years and years and years.

You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.

My goal is just to become a better comedian.

I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability.