Have you heard about the women who stabbed her husband 37 times? I admire her restraint.

And, you know, I liked writing humor. Well, I should say, I wanted to write seriously, but it kept turning funny.

Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself.

Any Hamas or Zionist type who tries to interfere with the labor unions and grab the money will be marched to the guillotines and subsequently beheaded. And isn't that easier and more productive than some endless, bloody conflict? So sayeth the gospel of common sense. Happy Mother's Day.

my parents ... had decided early on that all of the problems in my family had somehow to do with me. All roads led to Roseyville, a messy, chaotic town where, as parents, they were required to visit, but could never get out of quick enough or find a decent parking place.

Self-esteem is the goddamn root of all evil.

Without democracy in our homes, we will never have it in the world.