I've never done anything for money, and that is why I got money. When you do stuff for money, you never get money.

Judaism is one of the last of the world's matrilineal philosophies. Matriarchies are always the cultures that patriarchy attacks and decimates, because they don't spend all their money on the military like patriarchy does. They are easy prey.

You know when you first get rich, and you, like, just buy everything that you see? I did that for several years. And I have sheds full of things, maybe sometimes nine copies of the same thing.

Excuse the mess but we live here.

I was raised on government cheese. As an adult, in my first marriage, my husband and I worked real hard just to go bankrupt. I happened to write some jokes about it. I did real well for myself.

Take this marriage thing seriously - it has to last all the way to the divorce.

A lot of people in television who've had successful shows claim the 'Roseanne' show as their starting place, and I'm really proud of that.