I'm never going to get married again. Three strikes, you're out. I think if I would try to get married again in California, I have to go to prison, don't I? I think you only get three.

The end of my addiction to fame happened at the exact moment Roseanne dropped out of the top ten, in the seventh of our nine seasons. It was mysteriously instantaneous!

We're not meant to be parents when we're 50.

A lot of times nerds are really artists listening to the beat of another drummer.

I was not raised a Zionist, but a socialist, as were most Jews before the Holocaust.

I'm never going to get married again. Three strikes, you're out. I think if I would try to get married again in California, I have to go to prison, don't I? I think you only get three.

Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive?