Abortion is a woman's right.

Patriarchy is impotent and qualitatively unable to solve even the most simple problems in the cosmos such as picking up their own socks or placing a carton of milk back in the refrigerator after drinking from it.

Being nuts is its own reward.

Half the world's starving; the other half is trying to lose weight.

politics and religion in the United States work like the twin grips of a pair of pliers on a critical mass of the masses.

I think I'm hysterical. I watch myself on tape and just roar - isn't that weird?

They've said 'Roseanne's nuts' for years, and now I'm going to make that a reality - I'm all about nuts now, macadamia nuts!