I avoided reality for most of my life. But once you deal with it, it's kind of cool.

One of the first things I bought when I made 'Roseanne Show' money was a farm in Iowa.

Sometimes for me not throwing a tantrum is what running a marathon or swimming the English Channel must be like for others of a less-challenging emotional nature.

I am a woman, therefore I am a problem solver.

I have more money than God, but not as much as Oprah.

I actually get more conservative when I'm in Vegas.

I'm enjoying my life, post-menopause, so much. It's just so great to grow into yourself, and not be bothered with all that tyranny of biology.