A good man doesn't just happen. They have to be created by us women. A guy is a lump like this doughnut.

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be no war. Just a greater emphasis on military apparel.

I’m not a politician. I think that uniquely qualifies me to become president of the U.S.

I will barnstorm American living rooms. Mainstream media will be unable to ignore me, but more importantly they will be unable to overlook the needs of average Americans in the run-up to the 2012 election.

My best friend Linda is leaving her husband just because he is unfaithful to her. That is no reason to leave the person. I feel like after that, you should stay with them and make sure that the rest of their life is sheer hell.

Why have I been chosen to deliver the message of female intelligence and its divinity to a deaf world of males? I have asked my god that question and She answered, 'Hey, why not you Roseanne?' Indeed, why not each of us?

I'm just into spirituality. I believe that in a previous life I used to be Shirley MacLaine.