Most parents are accustomed to dealing with problems in the heat of the moment.

Being completely in control is a fantasy.

If we're being unilateral, then communication does not happen, the relationship does not happen.

People still look askance at a kid in the supermarket who's pitching a fit and think the parent is not sufficiently in control or not being sufficiently punitive. That's an issue for a lot of parents as well.

Parents are much more likely to be attuned to what they don't like than they are to the expectations that the kid is having difficulty meeting.

My advice to educators is collaborate with parents; they know a lot about their kids.

Challenging behavior is just a signal, the fever, the means by which the kid is communicating that he or she is having difficulty meeting an expectation.