We never get to see that our kid is capable of solving problems on her own. We never start to build up the faith that they can actually do it.

Everybody is talking about the behavior. Behaviors float downstream to us. We need to paddle upstream. The problems that are causing the behaviors, that's what's waiting for us. It's a crucial paradigm shift.

People don't scream or swear or pout or sulk when there's compatibility. But most growth occurs when there's incompatibility. When it comes to resilience, when it comes to pulling yourself up when you've fallen down, you don't learn those things when things are going well. You learn those things when you're struggling.

There is still quite the vibe out there that as a parent you have to be completely in control and in charge.

My advice to educators is collaborate with parents; they know a lot about their kids.

If a solution isn't mutually satisfactory, it's not going to stick.

If we're being unilateral, then communication does not happen, the relationship does not happen.