For a very long time, people have been saying to me, "What if you want to do this approach with every kid?" For a behaviorally challenging kid, you're parenting this way just to help bring the kid's behavior under control and to greatly reduce conflict. But you want to teach all kids the skills that are on the better side of human nature: empathy, appreciating how one's behavior is affecting other people, resolving disagreements in ways that do not involve conflict, taking another's perspective, honesty.
Ross W. GreeneIt's a whole lot more productive to be in problem-solving mode than it is to be in behavior modification mode.
Ross W. GreeneIf we're being unilateral, then communication does not happen, the relationship does not happen.
Ross W. GreeneChallenging behavior is just a signal, the fever, the means by which the kid is communicating that he or she is having difficulty meeting an expectation.
Ross W. Greene