With Michael Jackson, what I thought was really interesting was the people saying: 'He looked really well in that final video.' I was, like: 'No, he didn't - he looked like someone had melted goat's cheese over a sex doll.'

When you're three, you're into custard, and jumping.

'Come back here, I'm a police officer!' and I shouted back 'No you're not! You're a monster!'

With Michael Jackson, what I thought was really interesting was the people saying: 'He looked really well in that final video.' I was, like: 'No, he didn't - he looked like someone had melted goat's cheese over a sex doll.'

Do you reckon the Queen has ever pulled a blanket up so just her head's showing and gone 'Philip, look at me! I'm a stamp!'

Have you ever thought about letting Cheesus into your Life?

The last time I saw African kids this excited, Madonna was at their school with a net.