If I were but a man who would be tall, I would be me.

If I were a man with gills, I would be a fish!

You know, I've got a confession to make myself. I'm not really a priest, I've just got my shirt on backwards.

I'd rather drive the yellow brick road, you wouldn't happen to know of a rental car place around.

I'm convinced to do improv. All you have to do is listen to what people are saying to you, and then just add more information to what they've just said. That's all there is to improv, but it's the hardest thing to do.

The sky, the sky beyond the door is bluuuuuuue!

I'm Jim Phillips, I have multiple personalities. I'm also a skindiver, a puppeteer, and I was the tenth president of the United States.