If I were but a man who would be tall, I would be me.

What do I do when we're not taping? Sit in a dark room and refine my plans for someday ruling Earth from a blimp. And chess.

Never interrupt me when I'm eating a banana.

Two thongs don't make a right.

I'm Jim Phillips, I have multiple personalities. I'm also a skindiver, a puppeteer, and I was the tenth president of the United States.

You know, I've got a confession to make myself. I'm not really a priest, I've just got my shirt on backwards.

If I were a man with gills, I would be a fish!