It feels weird in our ear holes to hear people worshipping a guy named Ron. We know Rons in our life.

I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon kissing.

Look at the people who are kind of the funniest cultures, they're the cultures of the people who have been the most oppressed, black people and Jews. Not that they're the only funny people, but culturally, it comes from the pain, you know?

I still have highs and lows, maybe I don't cry salty tears as much.

In your twenties, I think you should have all of the sex that you're inclined to have, as long as you're safe about it. Use condoms and everything. Go with your instincts. This is the time to have a lot of sex and do drugs. But make sure you live through it.

I was a bedwetter until I was about 15, and it was humiliating.

I buy water at the liquor store across the street from where I live. So I'm walking into the door, and standing, loitering, outside the door is a man. And I walk by him to go in, and he says, "I want pussy!" Now, I don't want to seem conceited or anything, but he was talking about me!