I commend you on all you've done for PETA, wrestling the one-eyed trouser snake with your bare hands, gently cuddling it in your arms, and nurturing it back to health.
Sarah SilvermanI can see myself adopting. I'm not in a rush to do it. I'm 39, I know, but I do love kids, and I'm very good - I've got a lot of really good moves.
Sarah SilvermanSometimes loving each other isn't enough. You have to be responsible for your own happiness. You can't stay in a relationship because you're afraid of the unknown.
Sarah SilvermanIf you sell the Vatican and you take that money and you use it to feed every single human being on the planet, you will get cah-azy pussy. All the pussy. I don't mean literally. That might not be your cup of tea. I don't know what your version of 'all the pussy' is. But you'll get all the pussy.
Sarah Silverman