If you quit being cunty, the whole world will stop being against you.

People who like what I do come in all shapes and sizes. Not sure what the common denominator is per se. Oh, it's meeee! But to be embraced by a progressive community means something to me and this one feels like home.

I don't wanna be labeled as straight or labeled as gay. I just want people to look at me and see me as white.

I don't like people whose job it isn't to be funny, to tell me what is and isn't funny.

A bull in just about any shop is gonna be a mess.

And then before going back for my sophomore year, I decided to change my major to arts and sciences, and my dad cut a deal with me: He said if I'd quit school he'd pay my rent for the next three years, as if I were in school.

Making my family laugh when I was little - it became an addiction. It was a kind of survival.