I'm so much more famous than I am financially successful. I mean, I live in a three-room apartment. I mostly make free videos on my couch. But I am fine.

Letting your freak flag fly is something, no matter who you are, that takes great bravery, straight up.

You know, I think whatever a comic talks about onstage is all they talk about offstage.

Some people say my humor focuses too much on stereotypes. It doesn't. It focuses on facts.

[I'm] almost positive there is no God.

And then before going back for my sophomore year, I decided to change my major to arts and sciences, and my dad cut a deal with me: He said if I'd quit school he'd pay my rent for the next three years, as if I were in school.

I don't like people whose job it isn't to be funny, to tell me what is and isn't funny.