I don't know how old I am because a goat ate the Bible that had my birth certificate in it. The goat lived to be twenty-seven.

Baseball is the most perfect of games, solid, true, pure and precious as diamonds. If only life were so simple. Within the baselines anything can happen. Tides can reverse; oceans can open. That's why they say, we don't stop playing because we get old. We get old because we stop playing.

If a man can beat you, walk him.

NO MAN CAN AVOID BEING BORN AVERAGE, BUT NO MAN HAS TO STAY AVERAGE.

If you tell a lie, always rehearse it. If it don't sound good to you, it won't sound good to anybody.

I was born in August, no July, 1908.

I used to feel so bad before I got to the clubhouse, I didn't know what to do. But when I put that ballsuit on, I don't know where I got the spark to save my life.