Your business clothes are naturally attracted to staining liquids. This attraction is strongest just before an important meeting.

The Cheesecake Factory is a great business model, but if you take your wife there for your 25th wedding anniversary, you might not reach your 26th.

If you haven't already told your kids 'don't fellate the president' then you're probably a bad parent.

Your business clothes are naturally attracted to staining liquids. This attraction is strongest just before an important meeting.

The source of all unhappiness is other people. As soon as you learn to think of other people as noisy furniture, the sooner you will be happy. - Wally's Keynote Speech

You probably think Stephen Hawking is in that wheelchair because of a motor neuron disease. But if you got as much barely-legal student poontang as The Hawkster, you'd be in a wheelchair too.

Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.