All of my stories are 95 percent truthful.

I was in my tighty-whities and I never woke up, and I ran over a mile.

Fred Astaire’s got nothing on me.

I go out into America, and I am literally navigating a minefield. Godliness has become abnormal.

In the military it was camouflage for the desert or the winter. And now it's the duck hunting colors - I think it's "real tree." It's comfortable. It's stuff that's made out of comfortable material, OK, and I'm comfortable in it.

If you kill it, you gotta grill it, so to speak.

What I tell young couples that are getting married is: you're going to have quarrels, and on some things, you're just going to have to agree to disagree. And when you go to bed at night, kiss each other and tell each other that you love each other. Don't go to bed mad. Life is too short. Keep it simple.