I've got nothing against any individual American, except that there aren't any. They're always Irish-American, African-American... There's never an American-American you can blame.

The truly beautiful are often abused for apparent ugliness just as those with great vision often bump into things.

Life is like a musical by Andrew Lloyd Webber. Very popular and not as bad as some would have you believe. That is, unspeakably awful but mercifully brief.

I've got nothing against any individual American, except that there aren't any. They're always Irish-American, African-American... There's never an American-American you can blame.

When you look in the mirror and despair and none of your clothes seem appropriate, relax, put the kettle on. It might suit you.

I don't worry about losing my looks. It's finding them on someone else that worries me.

He who disagrees with me in private, call him a fool. He who disagrees with me in public, call him an ambulance.