The way to a man's heart is through his stomach...just make sure you thrust upward through his ribcage.

In America, we know to ignore artists if they're serious in any way.

I don't trust books. They're all fact, no heart. And that's exactly what's pulling our country apart today. Because face it, folks, we are a divided nation. Not between Democrats or Republicans, or conservatives and liberals, or tops and bottoms. No, we are divided by those who think with their head, and those who know with their heart.

I'm fascinated that people drawn to cults want to know what to do. And people want to know what to think. And people want to know how to feel. Not just what to feel but how to feel.

Can't wait for tomorrow when I get to exercise my patriotic duty as an American: Complaining about how long it's taking to VOTE.

Contrary to what people may say, there's no upper limit to stupidity.

Think books aren't scary? Well, think about this: You can't spell "Book" without "Boo!