Truthiness is "What I say is right, and [nothing] anyone else says could possibly be true." It's not only that I feel it to be true, but that I feel it to be true. There's not only an emotional quality, but there's a selfish quality.

Atheism: the religion devoted to the worship of one's own smug sense of superiority.

I may not agree with what you have to say but I will fight you to the death for the right to fight you to the death.

You don't need the right facts if you have the right inflection.

Look, PETA! If God hadn't wanted us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them so darn tasty!

The lead singer of Creed says he won’t endorse President Obama. Well that settles it -- Obama will not win the 1998 presidential election.

If I had one wish, it would be for self-drying pants. Wait -- no! Unlimited wishes! How do I return these stupid pants?!