A father has to be a provider, a teacher, a role model, but most importantly, a distant authority figure who can never be pleased. Otherwise, how will children ever understand the concept of God?

And if you love only yourself, you will serve only yourself. And you will have only yourself.

There's nothing wrong with being gay. I have plenty of friends who are going to hell.

There's an old saying about those who forget history. I don't remember it, but it's good.

Republicans and nerds have so much in common -- they both live in fantasy worlds and have no idea how to relate to women.

Making a better tomorrow, tomorrow.

I've got butterflies in my stomach... because I ate a cocoon quesadilla!