I don't accept the status quo. I do accept Visa, MasterCard, or American Express.

I've always been a big fan of beauty. Sure, you can't judge a book by its cover but who wants to have sex with a book?

I believe Sarah Palin is a true statesman, whose experience as a failed vice presidential candidate, half-term governor and eight-episode reality star has fully prepared her to take control of our nuclear arsenal.

God works in mysterious ways but at least he works, he's never on welfare in a mysterious way.

I'm not a fan of facts. You see, the facts can change, but my opinion will never change, no matter what the facts are.

The worst thing about affirmative action is that it encourages reverse discrimination, so-called because it goes in the opposite way of how we naturally discriminate.

Remember, Jesus would rather constantly shame gays than let orphans have a family.