Any religion whose messiah’s name isn’t recognized by Microsoft Word can’t be that much of a threat.

Never throw caution to the wind. It could whip back into your eyes and blind you.

I love the earth. If you ask me it's the greatest planet in the world.

Now, for my younger viewers out there, a book is something we used to have before the internet. It’s sort of a blog for people with attention spans.

Women don't want all that. Women just want a partner who is considerate and attentive, who will spoon with them while reciting Keats, and feed them organic yogurt by candlelight on a seaside cliff at sunset.

I'm a junkie for exhaustion, and I'm a junkie for setting up my expectations too high and then trying to meet them.

'Sympathy for the Devil' is just another way of saying 'Compassionate Conservative'.