Acting from the appropriateness of the heart, we are freed from the neediness of the mind.

If you want the other person more than anything else in the world, you're in major trouble and the relationship is a wobbly pivot. It's different if the thing you want most in the world is truth, and your partner is the person you want most in the world.

In Chinese, the word for heart and mind is the same -- Hsin. For when the heart is open and the mind is clear they are of one substance, of one essence.

Your distance from your partner is the distance from your heart. The things that make relationships difficult are some of the most precious aspects to us.

Letting ourselves be forgiven is one of the most difficult healings we will undertake. And one of the most fruitful. (79)

Our suffering is caused by holding on to how things might have been, should have been, could have been.

Simply touching a difficult memory with some slight willingness to heal begins to soften the holding and tension around it. (74)